SL for Nowt

Living a digital life with empty pockets

Lucky Chair etiquette – saying ‘thank you’

Excuse me if I’m textually gnashing my teeth here, but I’ve spent a short while today, hovering around the three Shoe Fly Shoes lucky chairs at Sarah Nerd’s Freebie Paradise. For those not in the know, Shoe Fly Shoes are offering a fabulous pair of superb designer quality monogrammed red leather shoes in these chairs. The letters don’t change all that regularly (around every 30 minutes or so) so while I was there, I kept scanning my radar to see if anyone with the current letters was in range.

Four times, people were. And so I sent four IMs: one to each person. The IM consisted of something that could be understood hopefully by most languages: Shoe Fly Shoes Lucky Chair at Sarah Nerds = ‘T’ (or whichever letter the person’s name began with) followed by the SLurl of my exact location in front of the chairs.

The first person I sent the IM to didn’t reply, even though I could see her eyeline moving (I had ‘show look at’ enabled), so I knew she wasn’t AFK. The second – who was standing about 10m away from me teleported out a minute later, was still online when I checked her profile, but didn’t bother to reply, not even to say ‘thanks but no thanks’. The third, again standing close by, said, ‘OK’ and didn’t move, then teleported out (to be fair, I don’t think English was her first language).

The fourth, however, walked over to the chairs, sat down and received her prize, then got up and walked away again without so much as a ‘thank you’. This was not a newbie avatar; she was created in 2007. She had English as a language spoken in her profile. I had cammed across the entire store to find her so I could send the IM.

People, if someone helps you to win an awesome lucky chair prize, a simple ‘thank you’ costs nothing.


January 28, 2009 - Posted by | grrr!, lucky chairs, mar's ponderings, second life


  1. During the POE hunt, at one of the locations I’d landed at, there was a girl there who was complaining about not being able to find the globe. She was frustrated and said she’d been looking for ages…and while I started looking, she teleported away, saying she was giving up trying to find it.

    I found the globe a few minutes later, looked in the local chat history to find her name, and IM’d her, letting her know I’d found the globe she was looking for, and could help her get it if she liked.
    She was still online, and she never replied.

    I’ve encountered things like this a few times, but that one stood out the most to me.
    While she didn’t ask for my help outright (there have been cases where people have asked me for help and I did, only to be ignored), but still…a “thanks” or “no thanks, I’m good” would’ve been nice, yes.

    Comment by Mae | January 30, 2009 | Reply

  2. I think, Mae, that it’s a general indicator of the way things seem to be going in society (especially online society) today (and lord, that makes me sound like my Mum *g*)

    I tried again at Sarah Nerd’s with another avatar, informing her about the lucky chair with her letter on it. I don’t know whether she thought I was spamming her with the SLurl, but her response was: “Go away. Go. Go! Fuck off!” Charming.

    If I want to IM someone out of the blue, I will always start with something like “Hi, Mae :)” before I begin the IM proper. Lately, if I’m sent IM out of the blue, I’m lucky if I get ‘Hey’ before the actual question is asked. A choice recent one, encountered again at Sarah Nerd’s went thusly:

    “Hey, where can I get full perm stuff free?”

    No “Hi, excuse me, but” or “Could you tell me if there’s somewhere I can get…?”

    I’m afraid I ignored that request. If someone can’t be bothered to treat me with basic courtesy, then they won’t receive a reply.

    Comment by Mar | January 30, 2009 | Reply

  3. Where would friending someone for the sole purpose of tp’ing them to flip chairs fall into? Recently while stalking the chair at Katat0nik, or fishing there, I found myself some new “friends”, and I think due to language differences, I misunderstood exactly what they wanted. Or, that they never stated it. But twice I went afk, and came back to find myself in a different location (not totally sure how, but whatever). I don’t want to be tp’d just to flip a chair, there’s only a few chairs I stalk in the first place. I could be in the middle of a fishing contest or building something, I don’t want to get tp’d away from either just for a chair.

    However, I usually try to be at least pleasant if someone lets me know my letter is on a chair. The only time I tp’d out after that, was when I was kind of stalking two chairs at once, and misunderstood which one my letter was on. I felt bad. Oops.

    Comment by Astrid | January 30, 2009 | Reply

  4. That’s a tricky one, Astrid. Quite often we get chatting to others while standing around lucky chairs, and friendship offers get made. It wouldn’t surprise me to learn that some avid lucky chair hoppers make sure they have at least the entire alphabet covered once (or more) by their friends list.

    However, if you’re going AFK and then ending up somewhere else, I’d be surprised if your friends are doing it. Every TP offer that is sent *must* be accepted by the receiving avatar before the TP is activated. Not even God Mode (in the Admin Tools) will force-TP an avatar, I believe (I think only the Lindens can use that, although it’s still there in the viewer that everyone uses).

    With regard to flipping a chair for others, I’m usually fine with it, unless I’m busy (which I usually am when I’m in-world). I could be in the middle of screencapturing for a tutorial, or even half-naked and trying on stuff. At this point, anyone sending me a TP offer would be declined, and I’d follow up with a, “Sorry, but I’m busy right now” IM. I would, however, be annoyed to think or realise I was only friended in the first place for the sole purpose of filling the ‘M’ slot on their “must have every letter covered!” friends list.

    Comment by Mar | January 30, 2009 | Reply

  5. I think maybe someone around the computer when I wasn’t there saw the request and clicked “ok.” But, when I get back I have no idea why I’m in a new region, or who sent the offer because they’re on to the next spot.

    I have declined a few of these requests. They usually just pop up as “Join me in ” with no explanation. At that point, no, I’m not going to go because I don’t know what you want. I don’t think it’d be too much to ask for “store name, lucky chair, letter” or something in the request if an IM is too much. I do have the suspecion though that I was added to fill an ‘A’ slot, which is kind of sad, since there are tons of ‘A’s’ out there. :)

    Comment by Astrid | January 30, 2009 | Reply

  6. With regard to not knowing who sent the TP offer, I really do wish that it could be incorporated into local chat history somehow, in the same way as the ‘teleport completed from (region name and X,Y,Z)’ is. “(Avatar Name) has offered to teleport you to his/her location” would be such a useful thing to have implemented in the viewer. Especially if it included the location name: “Join me in…”

    You do need to be very careful about leaving your avatar logged in while others are around and may potentially access your account. Although you’re not sure that this *is* what happened, it’s technically a violation of the ToS (in a silly way, really) because you are ‘giving’ someone else access to your account. Which, given that we all need to eat and use the loo sometimes, is a bit daft, but then if food and loo breaks are excluded from that ToS, then every griefer or troublemaker would simply say, “I was AFK, cooking dinner!” or, “I was just in the bog!”

    Comment by Mar | January 30, 2009 | Reply

  7. to give the benefit of the doubt to avs that don’t respond; it’s quite possible they’re experiencing chat lag. I know I have quite frequently.

    Comment by Calinacase Whiteberry | February 6, 2009 | Reply

  8. Very good point, Calinacase. Those chairs do get pretty packed out sometimes!

    Comment by Mar | February 6, 2009 | Reply

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